It’s completely understandable if you feel overwhelmed about organizing your wedding. It’s completely natural to be at least a tad stressed about what’s supposed to be one of the happiest days of your life. There’s a lot of pressure! Some brides deal with this stress fantastically. They embrace the fact that some things might go wrong and they choose to see these unexpected events as surprises.
Unfortunately, others morph into bridezillas, try to control every tiny little detail, and lash out at their friends. Our team at Bored Panda has collected some of the most intense conversations of brides conflicting with their bridesmaids. Read on to see how not to treat your dear friends and why it’s best to avoid hashing out your issues online.
Getting married can be a very stressful thing. Not only do you have to craft the ‘perfect’ guest list and find a romantic venue for the ceremony as well as the reception, but you also have to send out tons of invites, think about the food, and consider a ton of decoration details. Oh, and planning your honeymoon! All while fitting into your budget…
If you decide to hire a wedding organizer, it can really help reduce the amount of stress you’re under. In fact, the more tasks you delegate to pros, the more you can focus on enjoying the run-up to your wedding.
#5
Sure, I’m Gonna Cut My Hair That I Grew And Took Care Of For 10 Straight Years, So You Can Feel A Tiny Bit More Special On That One Day
#6
Bridesmaid Demands That The Bride Pay £190 For A Pair Of Shoes The Bridesmaid Chose. This Is After The Bride Had Offered Numerous Options Within A Certain Price Range
Generally, if there’s some sort of massive issue between you and a friend/bridesmaid, it’s best to talk to them face-to-face in private. It’s easy to lose a lot of the nuance when you’re primarily communicating online. When you meet up in person, there’s no hiding from their reactions, so you tend to be slightly more diplomatic and caring.
When you’re looking at a screen, it’s sometimes easy to forget that there’s a living, breathing person reading what you wrote on the other side.
#7
Imagine Thinking Everyone Has Been Waiting Their Whole Lives For You To Get Married, Therefore They Should Happily Spend Nearly $300 On A Dress To Be A Part Of It
#8
So This Bride Thinks That The Solution To Bridesmaid Dresses Not Arriving Is To… Get New Bridesmaids?
On top of that, when you’re criticizing someone in a group chat, you’re amping up the tension and causing (potentially) unnecessary drama. Instead, you could be looking for compromises or de-escalating the entire situation.
It’s important to remember that you and your bridesmaids are a team—or, well, you’re supposed to be one. Some conflict is probably inevitable, but at the end of the day, your friendship should matter more than proving that one of you is wrong.
Many arguments and conflicts happen either because there’s a disconnect between people’s goals and values or when there’s miscommunication. Oftentimes, it’s better to have more communication than a lack of it.
The rule of thumb is to never assume that someone knows what you’re thinking or feeling. Nobody’s a mind-reader (probably; maybe; we’re 99% sure!), so if something’s bugging you or you spot an issue, speak up.
However, it’s not enough to notice flaws in someone else’s wedding, bridal shower, or bachelorette party plans. How you bring up these potential problems is just as important (if not more) than stating the issue itself.
People are often very attached to the plans they make. They might take any criticism of their ideas as an attack on their person. So, it’s usually best to err on the side of diplomacy than to be too blunt.
Transparency and problem-solving aren’t sins. But many folks feel insulted and get overly defensive if they’re directly criticized. All that being said, there are definitely cases when you need to be more direct.
Not everyone is adept at picking up subtle clues that they should do something differently for the wedding or any other event. Or they might avoid the issue under the guise that they’re clueless. In those cases, be friendly, but be clear about your expectations as well as your worries.
#19
Since When Has It Become Normal To Have People Go Broke For Your Wedding? They Aren’t The Ones Getting Married, They Are There To Support You
#21
Ah Yes, The Good Old “Get Pregnant, So I Won’t Need To Be In A Bridal Party” Scheme. Works Every Time
Your bridesmaids are probably your family or friends, so they should be able to understand where you’re coming from, no matter the problem. The same goes in reverse.
The bridesmaids should feel like they can speak to the bride about any potential issues openly, without worrying about her transforming into the mythical fire-spitting snarling bridezilla.
#24
Bride Wouldn’t Accommodate Her Heavily Pregnant Bridesmaid — Forced Her To Pull Out Of The Bridal Party
If you find that the bride or your bridesmaids are gossiping about you and your ideas behind your back, it’s really not a good look. You’re all meant to be united in celebrating love and your friend starting a new era. While gossip is never going to go away (it’s a core part of being a human being), we can at least refrain from saying awful things about the people we’re supposed to care deeply about.
#26
I Was Part Of A Bridal Party And There Were Too Many Things Expected From Us
The images are from the engagement event in which the bridal party was responsible to fund, supply, set up, and breakdown (clean) the venue. The parents supplied some of it, but you can see the cost breakdowns expected of the bridal party.
Overall, I spent about $2,000 on the various events and travel for this wedding and I never even received a thank you! It was almost no-contact post-wedding, with the exception of one pitiful last-minute invite to their housewarming via text message three days in advance, which I declined and I wasn’t acknowledged nor did I ever hear from them again. Obviously, it was good riddance to such a horrible selfish non-friend, but it was a sad realization that I was just taken advantage of.
#27
Bride Is Mad That The Maid Of Honor Is Pregnant And Is “Ruining” Her Bachelorette Party
Ultimately, if you feel that your bridesmaids objectively do not have your best interests at heart, you may want to talk to them about any resentment or frustration simmering beneath the surface. It may be the case that your expectations for their role in the wedding might simply be too high.
Alternatively, they might have done something that made you reconsider their role, as well as your entire friendship. In case there’s been a falling out, it might be best to talk to them about how you’d like them to skip your wedding. This is better done in person while also leaving the door open a little bit for reconnecting after your Big Day.
What’s the biggest disagreement you’ve ever witnessed between a bride and her bridesmaids, dear Pandas? Have you ever fallen out with either in the run-up to the wedding? What’s the spiciest wedding drama you’ve ever been a part of? If you’re up for sharing, feel free to write a comment at the bottom of this post.
#35
Maid Of Honor Informs Us That We Can’t Cut Our Hair, Shape Our Eyebrows, And Implies We Should Lose Weight
#47
Anonymous Bride Wants To Know If It’s “Bridezilla” To Pressure Bridesmaids Into Getting Drunk So They Don’t Have “Old Grandma Energy” At Her Bachelorette Party
#48
Bride Is Insisting Her Bridesmaids Wear Converse Sneakers, Even The Ones Who Physically Can’t
HR stands for Hallux Rigidus. It’s a condition where you basically can’t bend your big toe and have to wear very specific shoes.
#51
The Bride Is More Upset That Her Friend Is Getting Married 10 Months Before Her Than She Is That Her Friend Is Marrying Someone Who Abuses Her
#61
Bridesmaid Is Way Too Caught Up In Her Romance. What’s Next? “You Can’t Celebrate Christmas, Because Boyfriend And I Do!”
#68
It Seems That Weddings For Some Women Are Not Celebrations Of The Start Of A Life With Someone They Love, But A Venue To Just Act Ugly
#70
Bride Almost Kicks Out The Entire Bridal Party For Not Responding, When She Told Them To Respond Only If They Wouldn’t Adhere To Her Demands
#73
Bride And All 17 Members Of The Bridal Party Receive This Email From A Bride’s Friend, Who Was Only Invited To The Wedding Out Of Pity After Throwing A Giant Fit
#78